I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I intend to get homeless drunk
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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