bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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