What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Every concussion has its silver lining
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
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