ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
