But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
