She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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