Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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