I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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