She's JV to your varsity
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
