I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
