I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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