Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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