that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
