i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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