Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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