I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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