toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
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