fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
