there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
