I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
