Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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