Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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