I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize