the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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