Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
