What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize