This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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