I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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