No, you can still breathe under the balls.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
