I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
