So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
