Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
