school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
