do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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