Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
