How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
