Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
