Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
