"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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