i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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