I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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