I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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