We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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