You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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