Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
