we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
