Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
