There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
