she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I could fuck to npr.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Randomize