I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
