Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Randomize
